I shall allow no man to belittle my soul by making me hate him. Booker T. Washington, author, educator, advisor to Presidents
Do you have a kindling pile of angry feelings just waiting to be set off? I believe it’s safe to say most everyone’s kindling piles are at an all-time high right now. As our pile grows higher, it takes less and less for it to ignite into a huge conflagration. The first step to reducing our pile is to recognize and own up to our angry feelings. Here area a few other tips:
- Write down everything that’s on your kindling pile. Be specific. Name what is making you angry, who is making you angry, disturbing circumstances that are out of your control, things that have been done to you, things you have done to others.
- Now, switch gears and take a moment to recall when you recently reached out to another or someone reached out to you in a positive and loving way. Remind yourself how you felt in these moments.
- If step two brought you some peace, go back to your kindling list. Is there any action you can take this week that will mitigate something on your list? Perhaps writing a letter to your Congressman, de-friending someone who is posting lies, or having a heart-to-heart with a loved one.
- Take what is left on the pile and spread it out in an imaginary field of love. This isn’t accepting or excusing what is bad or wrong, it’s just recognizing that lasting change comes through love—love for ourselves, each other, our country, and our world.
Affirmation: I accept and process my angry feelings.
Coaching question: What’s making you angry? What’s one step you will take this week to mitigate a piece of your anger? What are you grateful for? What’s love got to do with it?
Photo by engin akyurt on Unsplash