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“Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.” Victor Hugo

The “getting to know you” question for our Girl Talk God Talk group today was “what brings you joy”? Of course many, many things bring me joy but the first thing that came to mind was music. One of the things I do in the morning is turn on music to get my day going, our beautiful 30 person church choir adds so much to worship, even the elderly gentleman playing the guitar and harmonica (at the same time) at the pancake breakfast was a joy. One of my fondest memories is enjoying the Chicago Symphony live.

Music seems to “soak into” our psyches and has the power to change our mood and our thoughts. How many remember the words to songs from your teenage years but can’t remember what you had for breakfast? The power of music. Bring it into your life. Let it soothe you, excite you, sing to your soul.

Affirmation: I am worthy of experiencing joy everyday.

Coaching question: What bring you joy?

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. Marcel Proust

I’ve had my eye out for one of Marco Island’s famous gopher tortoises. I want my guests to experience our bountiful island nature and so far they have seen various birds, our precious burrowing owls, and dolphins but no tortoise. Then, last night as we were returning at twilight from a Mexican dinner on St Patrick’s Day (weird, I know), there was a gopher tortoise in the middle of the street right in front of our house.  They were delighted…and so was I.

Sometimes what we are looking for pops up when we least expect it. Perhaps you’re looking for joy, peace, relief from a broken heart. Don’t give up. Expect the unexpected. Hold out hope and you too may experience the unexpected.

Affirmation: I deserve to have joy and peace in my life.

Coaching question: What are you looking for? What would bring you joy if it popped up in your life?

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass…it’s about learning to dance in the rain.” Vivian Greene

This morning my friends and I are headed to the Goodland Annual Pancake Breakfast. Goodland is a  fishing village on Marco Island. Hurricane Irma devastated this small town and many are still in recovery. Two of my best friends live there so I was visiting soon after the hurricane and I felt as though I had entered a war zone just after a bombing. My friend Beverly’s clothes drier was found a couple of blocks from her house with a dead fish inside, the trailer across the street from her was a pile of rubble, and a home to the right had lost it’s entire upper floor…not just the roof, the whole floor. Never the less, on this beautiful March morning, almost six months to the day of the hurricane, these resilient villagers are hosting a pancake breakfast.

Have you been tossed and turned by the storms of life? Has a devastating wind blown through your heart? Take a cue from the good folks of Goodland…throw yourself a pancake breakfast, or a pizza party, or a shopping spree, go out and dance in the rain.

Affirmation: I can overcome the storms of life and not only survive, but thrive.

Coaching question: What “clean-up” do I need to do to make the landscape of my soul beautiful again?

“Just living is not enough…one must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.” Hans Christian Andersen

Because of the time change, I woke up this morning to a glorious orange sunrise over Barfield Bay….without even taking my head off my pillow. What a way to experience God in nature first thing! And that’s not all. Yesterday as I took my visiting friends down our little path to the water, a dolphin swam by greeting my nature-loving friend, Laurie, on her birthday. Then we went on an airboat ride through the Everglades. My “Nature Bucket” is filled!

If you are experiencing sadness, grief, or feeling just a tad sorry for yourself today, get outside. If you’re in the Midwest, perhaps you’re seeing the crocus peek out. Even if the day isn’t beautiful you’ll feel better having experienced a bit of nature.

Affirmation: Nature is a gift. It brings me joy.

Coaching question: What is your favorite thing in nature? What aspect of nature brings you closer to God?

“A best friend is like a four leaf clover….have to find, lucky to have”.

Two special girlfriends from Illinois arrived yesterday and they are a reminder of the significance of the above quote. I am so lucky to have friends!! As a motherless daughter and an only child, friends have always been especially important to me. I didn’t have a big sister to lean on or a mother in whom I could confide but I did have girlfriends. Now at a time in my life when I don’t meet friends at school or at work or PTA, discovering and nurturing friendships takes a bit more effort but is soooo worth it.

To have friends, you must be a friend. I remember the hours long phone calls I used to have with my best friend, Jenny, immediately after I had just walked home from school with her. Today I still have long calls with my best friend, Nanc, who I had to leave behind in Illinois.

As I always say to my single friends who are looking for romance, “Prince Charming is not going to come knocking at your door. You have to walk out the door to find him.” The same is true with friends. When I moved to Marco Island, one of my first priorities was to find friends. Boy was I lucky! I found friends right away but I did have to walk out the door, join organizations and then nurture those acquaintances into friendships.

Affirmation: I am a person who deserves a good friend.

Coaching question: What do friendships mean to you? How will you nurture a friendship this week?

“My barn having burned to the ground, I can now see the moon.” Japanese Haiku

Having just experienced Hurricane Irma on Marco Island, Florida, I can identify with this Haiku. We didn’t lose our home – thank goodness – but we did have significant damage. The good news…we now have a water view where before there was none. Enough trees were taken down in our adjoining mangroves that the water view emerged from our ground floor. This is so like life isn’t it? As tragedy strikes and we mourn, later we look back and see how we were changed… often in a positive way.

As I look back over my life, I can see how I adapted to the stones or boulders in the road and found new paths. Through my mother’s early death I learned how to be resilient at a young age, I became independent, I learned to cook, write checks and manage money, to name a few.

Affirmation for today…I look at my life through positive eyes. I acknowledge my ability to have positive, loving relationships and an abundant, prosperous, joy-filled life.

Coaching question: In what way have you grown through the “burning barns” of your life?

 

Welcome to my blog. I’m looking forward to becoming friends.

By way of introduction, I’m the motherless daughter of a motherless daughter….my mother died when I was eight, her mother (my grandmother) when my mother was two. Whence the blog title. But….I’m also a wife, mother, grandmother, step great-grandmother. I’m a retired social worker, marketing entrepreneur and certified Life Coach. I’ve been divorced, widowed and remarried. I love to cook, read, travel, hang out with friends, write, and (hopefully) make a difference in the world and to those around me.

I will be 73 years old in July so I have done a bit of living. In addition to sharing  experiences around “life after losing a mother” (through death, abandonment, dementia), I will also post about gratitude, joy, affirmation, faith. Sometimes we will consider issues like feelings of abandonment, loneliness, fear of intimacy,  In addition to sharing my own insights, I will share the wisdom of other daughters who have had profound mother loss as well as experts in the field.

I hope you will join me in this journey.

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton