Tag: understanding

Come, Meet Me In the Field

by Mershon Niesner

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there. Rumi, Persian poet

We’re all experiencing “the great divide.” Worldwide, political organizations, and the people who follow them, are taking hardline stances. A friend of mine recently said how she is making an effort to have a better understanding of people with political views different from hers. What a great role model!

It sounds like my friend wants to meet “in the field”—that wide-open space where compromise and understanding can take place.  

Affirmation: I will make an effort to meet others in the field.

Coaching questions: What does the “field” look like from your vantage point? Is it a place to meet where understanding can happen?

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash 

Is My Red Your Blue?

by Mershon Niesner

Perhaps your blue is my red. Each of us comes to the world with an individual perspective and experiences life in a unique way. Impractical Juggler, from Medium Daily Digest

My dad, husband, and grandson are/were color-blind. Their purple is my blue and their orange is my red or pink. This is a concrete example of how our internal worlds can be different. Now, consider all the other perceptions others make that are unlike our own. Our internal worlds are not absolute. 

When we learn to base our interactions on the fact that we are all unique and come with different perspectives, we have a chance for greater empathy and understanding. In my experience, I’ve learned that whatever I thought I knew can be questioned by another with a different understanding, set of experiences, or vision. Only when we learn to understand and embrace our differences will we have a chance for peace. 

Affirmation: I embrace internal differences.

Coaching questions: How have you been misunderstood? What can you do to have greater understanding of those who perceive things differently?

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Ask Yourself These Three Questions

by Mershon Niesner

We know so many things but we don’t know ourselves. Go into your own ground and learn to know yourself there.  Meister Eckhart, German theologian

Naikan is a Japanese word meaning “inside looking” or “introspection.” Naikan, used as a method of self-reflection, was developed by Japanese Buddhist, Yoshioto Ishin. The Naikan approach broadens our view of reality and helps us heal the past. Naikan reflection is based on three questions:

What have I received from __________?

What have I given to ____________?

What troubles and difficulties have I caused __________?

These questions will help you reflect on your relationships and see them from all sides. They can be helpful in the process of forgiveness, understanding, and a reality check on your own behavior.

Affirmation: I’m willing to look inside.

Coaching question/request: Take 20 minutes and reflect on these questions. Consider using them as prompts in a daily meditation. What difference might the answers make in your life?