Are You Missing the Rocks?

QUIT = Quickly Uphold Important Things. Richie Norton, Author

Keeping our values, or what’s most important to us, in the forefront of our life can be a challenge. We all hear ourselves or our friends say, “I don’t have time to exercise,” or “Eating out is much easier, I don’t have time to cook,” or “I’m so busy I barely see my friends anymore.” And yet, if asked, these same people would say that health and friends are two of the most important aspects of their life.

Think of your life as a large jar. Place the stones of your life in first – those things that are most important like health, family, friends, personal well-being, faith. Next, add the sand – less important but constant activities like involvement in an organization that’s meaningful to you. Finally, fill your jar with water. The water represents inconsequential but often time-consuming activities like watching television, playing computer games or surfing. If the jar is first filled with sand and water, there will be no room for the rocks. Keep a jar on your counter or desk as a reminder to first fill your life with what’s most important.

Affirmation: I will fill my life with what’s most important to me.

Coaching questions: What fills your imaginary jar? If it’s missing the rocks of your life, what will you do to make a course correction? What’s one step you will take today to move you towards emptying your jar of all the water and sand and add the big rocks?

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Values vs Differences

Our shared values define us more than our differences. And acknowledging those shared values can see us through our challenges today if we have the wisdom to trust in them again. John McCain, American statesman and military officer who served as a United States Senator until his death.

One of our greatest challenges in the U.S. today is learning to get along in our divided political landscape. For me, shared values and true friendship trumps (sorry for the pun) political differences. Yesterday, one of my best friends called to acknowledge how I’m using prayer for our president as a way to bring about change and inner peace for myself. She knows I’m taking action in other ways as well and supports my need for involvement. 

This is what friendship is all about! Overcoming our political divide has actually brought us closer as we have had to talk about the hard questions and define our common values. To her credit, it is my friend who has called me, not the other way around. Although our politics can occasionally be the “elephant or donkey in the room,” our friendship has survived and even thrived in spite of it. 

Affirmation: Shared values define my friendships.

Coaching questions: Do you have relationships that need repair in this environment? Are they worth it? If so, what will you do to heal in spite of your differences?

Get Into Action

Somewhere inside of all of us is the power to change the world. Roald Dahl, British novelist, short story writer, screenwriter, fighter pilot

It’s mid-term election day in the United States. Many have literally died and been imprisoned to give you the right to vote. Not voting empowers others. For the first time in my life I’ve been politically active and involved. One of the most frustrating circumstances any of us can experience is the feeling of having no control over our destiny. That’s why I’ve become politically active. My values are being challenged, the future of my grandchildren and the world they will inherit are at stake and I have to do something beyond hand wringing. 

If you feel out of control in an area of your life, taking an action, no matter how small, can help you regain your balance and power. 

Affirmation: I have the power.

Coaching questions: In what areas of your life do you feel you have lost control? What action can you take to regain your equilibrium?