Blog

Advancing the Battle Against Cancer

by Mershon Niesner

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow. Mary Anne Radmacher, author

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and we have something to celebrate. Yesterday, the Nobel Prize for Medicine was awarded to James P. Allison and Tasuku Hong for their advances in harnessing the immune system to fight cancer. 

Their approach is to remove the brakes that keep the immune system in check, unleashing it against tumor cells. These “checkpoint inhibitor” therapies have greatly increased survival of cancer patients.

My mother died of cancer over 64 years ago when therapies were very limited. In the last year I’ve talked to many women who also lost their mothers to this terrible disease. I’m encouraged to know that, through the ongoing support of ordinary people like you and me, we are making advances in the war against cancer. 

Affirmation: I fight for the cure.

Coaching question: When did you have your last mammogram? What else can you do to help fight breast cancer?  

October, Baptize Me With Leaves!

by Mershon Niesner

October, baptize me with leaves! Swaddle me in corduroy and nurse me with split pea soup. October, tuck tiny candy bars in my pockets and carve my smile into a thousand pumpkins. O autumn! O teakettle! O grace! Rainbow Rowell, American author

What a lovely ode to October. I guess if your first name is Rainbow, you have no choice but to become a poet. Right? I no longer experience the leaves or corduroy (does anyone wear corduroy anymore?), but  I did put out buckets of mums, pumpkins, wreaths of colored leaves on my front door, and I made some beef-vegetable soup. I’m celebrating! 

With so many tragedies happening in the world…earthquakes, tsunamis, floods…we must grab the gold ring of October and, if we are safe and whole, be thankful for our blessings and do what we can for those unable to celebrate. 

Affirmation: I am grateful.

Coaching question: How are you celebrating Fall? What can you do for those less fortunate? 

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Trusting Your Gut

by Mershon Niesner

Intuition is seeing with the soul. Dean Koontz, American author

We frequently say, “My gut is telling me…”  we don’t call our intuitive feelings “ear feelings” or “hand feelings” because they really do originate in our gut or our enteric nervous system (ENS) which is in our intestinal tract. According to Michael Gershon, MD in his book The Second Brain, the ENS functions very much like an independent cerebellum. Lined with nerve cells, it can react to stimuli without direction from our head-based brain.

Get to know how your intuition speaks to you and test it by trusting your intuitive feelings in low-risk circumstances. Be aware that intuition can be hijacked by prejudice, social conditioning, and excessive sensory stimulation (I’m thinking social media). Nevertheless, we have this powerful tool at our disposal and it is to our benefit to use it whenever possible. 

Affirmation: I trust my intuition.

Coaching question: How does your intuition speak to you? What can you do to trust going towards your warm, intuitive feelings more frequently?

Treasure Your Memories With Photos

by Mershon Niesner

What I like about photographs is that they capture a moment that’s gone forever, impossible to reproduce. Karl Lagerfeld, Creative Director of the fashion houses Chanel and Fendi

Although I live in southwest Florida where the temperature is still ninety degrees, it is beginning to feel like fall. For me, summer ended when I left Illinois where I enjoyed playdates with grandkids, lunches with daughters, and special family events like weddings and a graduation. 

Above my desk is a large, wall bulletin board placed there by the original owners. On it I have my summer memories which I can relive in the blink of an eye. As Mr. Lagerfeld says, these photos capture a never-to-be-repeated moment but can be relived over and over in my memory. What photos do you have that help you relive special moments in your life? 

Affirmation: I treasure my memories.

Coaching request: Get out an old family photo album or print out some recent photos from your phone. Enjoy the moments that were captured and acknowledge your past.

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Showing Respect

by Mershon Niesner

Show respect to all people, but grovel to none. Tecumseh, Native American Shawnee warrior and chief.

Tecumseh was among the most celebrated Indian leaders in history and was known as a strong and eloquent orator who promoted tribal unity. Tecumseh knew a thing or two about respect and, unfortunately, he learned about disrespect at the hands of the U.S. government.

Respect is the cornerstone of relationships, friend to friend, colleague to colleague, or country to country. As we respect the life experiences of others, including their differences, we are enriched in our own journey. At all cost, we must hold on to our mutual respect otherwise, as Confucius said, “We are no better than the beasts.”

Affirmation: I respect myself and others.

Coaching questions: In an age when disrespect has become the norm, what can you do to hold on to the power of respect in your life? Where is the line between respect and groveling?
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The Rock

by Mershon Niesner

Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God. Corrie Ten Boom, Dutch watchmaker who helped Jews escape the Nazi Holocaust and was imprisoned.

In a time of grief or despair, trusting in God can give us hope and a positive sense of expectancy. 

When my late husband died suddenly from a heart attack ten months after we were married, I affirmed out loud to a couple of hundred people that God was my rock and I would be ok…and I was/am. I didn’t feel ok at the time but faith isn’t based on how we feel. We have choices….hope or despair. 

If you’ve lost or given up on your faith, I encourage you to take another look. Inner peace follows the choice of hope and faith.

Affirmation: I have faith in God.

Coaching questions: What/who is the rock in your life? If this is a time of despair and hopelessness for you, what’s one step you can take to regain a sense of inner peace? 

At a Snail’s Pace

by Mershon Niesner

Snails do not despair for having short legs, but rejoice for being able to travel long distances in spite of them. Matshona Dhliwayo, Canadian philosopher, entrepreneur, author

Do you despair having short legs like the snail or extra pounds or thick ankles? Women in particular seem to see what needs to be “fixed” rather than what is terrific. Although I still lament those extra pounds that have plagued me most of my adult life, as I’ve aged I’ve become more and more thankful for a healthy body, no matter the flaws.

Frequently we can become so identified with the losses, heartaches and all that we despair, we lose sight of the those things for which we can rejoice. It might take the snail a week of non-stop travel to move a half mile down the road but he’s still moving forward. Be like the snail.

Affirmation: I rejoice in my healthy body and the ability to move forward.

Coaching question/request: What snail-like step can you take today to move away from despair? Think about the one thing you like the least about your body and affirm it anyway.

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Together We Make Change

by Mershon Niesner

Each one of us can make a difference. Together we make change. Barbara Mikulski, former U.S. Senator

In the last few days, my blog was visited by people from Canada, Hong Kong, Italy, India, China, Ireland, Russia, South Africa, Germany, United Kingdom, and the United States. The power of the Internet never ceases to amaze me. I started my blog on March 12 and have blogged everyday since (missing one day without Internet).

The blog was created to promote my yet-to-be-published book, Mom’s Gone—Now What? but it has turned into so much more. I know a few of my followers count on it to show up in their email everyday to read with their morning coffee. I do it for them. Some readers are the daughters I interviewed for my book. I do it for them. I write it for myself as well….to probe the depths of my heart and brain, to share thoughts that may resinate, to make a difference.

Affirmation: I can make a difference.

Coaching questions: In what ways do you make a difference? In what new way would you like to make a difference? Take one step today in that direction. 

Wise Women Cultivate Friendships

by Mershon Niesner

Of all the things which wisdom provides to make life entirely happy, much the greatest is the possession of friendship. Epicurus, Philosopher

I’m very fortunate to have good friends. Being an only child, friends become “sisters” to me and I cherish them. Unlike children, grandchildren, and other relatives, friends choose one another. I’m not sure what Epicurus had in mind when he spoke of wisdom and friendship, but I do know that a wise woman seeks friends with whom she can be truly herself, women (and men) who share her joys and sorrows, who help her to become a better person, who make her heart sing. 

If your life is confined to your work and immediate family or husband and grandchildren, cat or dog, I encourage you to find a friend. Friends take time, energy, and cultivation (just like a beautiful garden) but, believe me, they will enhance your life for the rest of your life.

Affirmation: I seek out and have good friends.

Coaching questions: What do friends mean to you? If you are missing one or more really good friends, what steps can you take to attract friends into your life? 

Coaching request: Tell a friend how much she means to you. 

Living In a Painting

by Mershon Niesner

Winter is a etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all. Stanley Horowitz, author

What an inspiring quote. I love thinking of the seasons in terms of art. Fall is now officially upon us and in the northern climates of the U.S. and other parts of the world, leaves are beginning to change and summer’s bloom is fading. Some days are hot, others cool…a true mosaic of other seasons. 

Here in south Florida, I’m noticing the terrific growth that occurred during the summer. Although hurricane Irma stripped and downed many trees and caused great damage, only traces remain. Life is like that. Storms sweep through, damage is done, then renewal follows in abundance. 

Affirmation: I embrace the seasons of life.

Coaching question: What does the painting of your like look like? What medium have you used? How can you renew the damage you’ve experienced? 

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