Blog

Medicine For Your Soul

by Mershon Niesner

Flowers always make people better, happier, and more hopeful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. Luther Burbank, botanist 

Living in southwest Florida, I’m surrounded by flowers year round—I know, I’m a lucky lady. Magnolias are rare, however, because of our soil. Never-the-less, I’m fascinated by their history. 

Magnolias are thought to be the oldest flowering plant on Earth dating back about 145 million years. They appeared just after the ferns and stood among the dinosaurs. Beetles served as their first pollinators since bees wouldn’t show up for about another 15 million years. There are over two hundred species and they come white, pale pink (as shown here), yellow, and deep magenta. 

Affirmation: Flowers are medicine for my soul!

Coaching questions: What is your favorite flower or flowering tree? When was the last time you took time (now is a really good time) to “smell the roses?”

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Photo by Christina DiBernardo on Unsplash

Stay Seated While On the Roller Coaster!

by Mershon Niesner

Stay in your seat in times of trouble. Only the people who jump off the roller coaster get hurt. Paul Harvey, radio broadcaster

Today I wanted to write a blog about something, anything, other than the crisis we are facing around the world. I’m “virus fatigued” yet hungry for the latest news. It feels as though we are on the roller coaster ride of our lives, Paul Harvey’s advice is relevant, and, once again, I’m writing about our shared experience.

We need to stay in our seats (at home), stay calm, virtually reach out to our friends and family for comfort, a good laugh, and remember— “people who jump off the roller coaster get hurt.” 

Affirmation: I will stay in my seat on the roller coaster ride of my life.

Coaching questions: What is helping you stay “seated?” Who can you help stay calm and unafraid? 

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Photo by Dmitry Mashkin on Unsplash

How Are You Handling Isolation?

by Mershon Niesner

If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it. The more things you do, the more you can do. Lucille Ball

People used to ask me how I got so much done. I hadn’t seriously considered the question until now that my new reality of isolation is moving into week two. Without my DAILY schedule of meetings, groups, events, outings, I’m getting less done than I used to. Lucille Ball was right!

While it feels okay right now to be in “gear-down” mode, in the future I want to be sure that I’m using my time well by honoring my gifts, taking good care of myself, taking care of others (remotely), and generally living each day to the fullest as I always have. I’m allowing myself another few days of “down time” then I’m getting serious about my to-do list, limiting my time on social media, and setting new long-term goals.

Affirmation: I will remain true to myself in this new reality.

Coaching questions: Is there anything tripping you up as you gear-down in this new reality? How will you stay true to yourself? What’s the best part of being home-bound? What’s the worst?

Leave me a comment about how you’re doing. I’m thinking about my blogging community worldwide!

 

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What Does the New Normal Look Like For You?

by Mershon Niesner

We sense that ‘normal’ isn’t coming back, that we are being born into a new normal: a new kind of society, a new relationship to the earth, a new experience of being human. Charles Eisenstein, author and speaker

In these unusual times, it’s important to establish a “new normal” for ourselves and our families. Most people thrive on routine. Although it might feel like you’re on vacation for a while, the lack of structure can be detrimental especially for younger people and those who are accustomed to going to an office outside their homes. 

Years ago I taught day-long workshops on How To Work From Home Successfully (I successfully worked from home for almost 20 years). Here are a few tips from that workshop:

 

  • Get up at the usual time (go to bed at the usual time too) 
  • Get dressed (do NOT stay in pajama pants), shave, comb your hair, shower
  • Establish a work routine including coffee break, lunch break
  • If possible, create a work space that is out of the family zone
  • If necessary, educate your family on the fact that you’re working so they can have food on the table.
  • Work your normal hours (8 am-5 pm, five days a week or whatever is normal for you)
  • Resist the temptation of  household chores, social media, text messages, television, or personal emails during your work day.

Affirmation: I will embrace my new normal.

Coaching questions/request: Create a “new normal” routine for yourself. What’s your biggest challenge right now? What’s one step you will take to overcome it?

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Photo by LinkedIn Sales Navigator on Unsplash

Eight Ways To Help You Feel Less Fearful

by Mershon Niesner

Courage is knowing what not to fear. Plato

Fear is running rampant in these troubled times as we face the Covid-19 virus and all the upheaval it’s causing. Some healthy fear and a good dose of caution is warranted. Here are tips to help you keep manage your fears: 

  1. Stay informed but know when to step away from news of all kinds. Be aware of how much information is too much for you then have the discipline to step away. 
  2. Get yourself out of the way. Consider what you can do, either virtually or in person, for those who may be more affected than you. 
  3. Take care of yourself. Keep up your healthy routine including good sleep, healthy eating, exercise, and a spiritual practice (especially if your place of worship is closed).
  4. Acknowledge your fear. Validate your feelings. Treat that scared little girl inside gently.
  5. Make a plan. Create a to do list (i.e. clean out the closets, make soup) and consider how you’d handle a health emergency. Planning is more useful to help you gain a sense of control than buying more toilet paper.
  6. Keep in touch. Call a friend or family member if you’re feeling lonely. Keep your extended family informed. Email and texting may not be as satisfying as they once were. It’s nice to hear a loved one’s voice when we are isolated.
  7. Trust yourself. In my experience people generally have a greater capacity to handle hardship than they think they do. Affirm your capabilities!
  8. Fear not! The words “fear not” show up in the Bible 365 times for a reason.

Affirmation: I trust myself and my capabilities.

Coaching questions: Who can you turn to for support right now? What can you do to help others? How will you use this time “away” productively?

Please note: If you are feeling severely depressed, anxious, or fearful, seek professional help. If you think a few minutes talking on the phone with a Certified Life Coach would be helpful, let me know in the comments section below. 

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Photo by Alexandra Gorn on Unsplash

Poop Or Petals?

by Mershon Niesner

A good laugh overcomes more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than any other one thing. Laura Ingalls Wilder, author

It’s the start of the 2020 burrowing owl nesting season on Marco Island, Florida. It’s the time of year the male owls are busy decorating their burrow entrances to attract their lifetime mates. 

According to an article by Maria Lamb in the Coastal Breeze, “The male owl goes nuts in their decoration choices. Some male owls prefer grass clippings while others prefer bright colored flowers, but their absolute favorite is dried up dog poop. Owls living on ranches display similar preferences for cow poop.” Who knew?

Just a little levity in these “heavy” times.

Affirmation: Humor is all around us.

Coaching question: If you were a female owl what would you prefer??

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Photo by Jhoneil Centeno on Unsplash

Embracing “Bubble-Ups”

by Mershon Niesner

So long as the memory of certain beloved friends lives in my heart, I shall say that life is good.” Helen Keller

One of the daughters I interviewed for my book referred to her sudden mother-memories as “bubble-ups.” We all have them. Those sights, smells, songs, sayings that cause the bubbling up of a memory of a precious person in our life who is gone. 

These bubble-ups frequently catch us off guard, surprising us with their power. Other bubble-ups are predictable like when the University of Nebraska football team takes the field, I can’t help but shed a tear…my dad is right there with me.

Affirmation: Memories are precious to me.

Coaching questions: What “bubble-ups” do you have? How do you handle them?

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Photo by Paul Schellekens on Unsplash

The Weight of Regret

by Mershon Niesner

We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons. Jim Rohn, motivational speaker

When I say “no” to a bowl of chips, I think of a version of this quote. I usually say to myself, Eventually discipline will have to intervene—now or 100 pounds from now. Choose wisely. I use this concept with relationship issues as well like choosing (mostly) to not respond to inflaming and, frequently, untrue political posts on Facebook or, more seriously, to tell someone I love that I’m sorry.

I try to keep a “clean slate” with people I care about. It’s been my experience that one never knows when there will no longer be a chance to say “I’m sorry” or “I forgive you.”

Affirmation: I choose discipline.

Coaching questions: Are you in danger of carrying around the weight of regret? What will it take for you to exercise discipline in this matter?

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Photo by i yunmai on Unsplash

Gratitude Makes Sense

by Mershon Niesner

Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. Melody Beattie, author

Did you know that positive thoughts create pathways in the brain? The more you feel gratitude, the easier it becomes. In addition, you’ll attract more for which to be grateful.

The motherless daughters I spoke with who found the path back to gratitude seemed to have also found a way to move forward in their lives. Expressing gratitude may sound like a cliche but being grateful for even the smallest thing will make a difference in your life. 

Affirmation: I am grateful.

Coaching questions/request: How do you show gratitude? When you were at a low point in your life, how did gratitude lift you up? Say thank you to God for His creation, to a person in your life for their love, or to yourself for noticing that you’re grateful. 

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Photo by eberhard grossgasteiger on Unsplash

Treasure Your Small Memories

by Mershon Niesner

“If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.” Abraham Lincoln

One of the few memories I have of my mother is the “coffee klatches” she and I attended in backyards on sunny summer mornings in Grand Island, Nebraska. Neighbor ladies congregated at ten, with kids in tow, to have a cup of coffee, enjoy each other’s companionship while taking a break from housework. 

What a lovely, lost tradition. It was late 1940’s to early 1950’s when we talked with each other face to face and lived at a slower pace. I “took care of” the younger kids. I was eight or younger but I was the big kid that pulled red wagons and tossed balls.

Affirmation: Memories are precious.

Coaching question/request: What’s a small, early memory of another time that is precious to you? Sit with your memory, allow yourself to float back to that time and place; soak in the moment.

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Photo by Blake Meyer on Unsplash